ramblings of an ex-sloth.

aaawwww zzzzz beep beep censored
i know,i know..good girls supposedly do not swear....especially ones like me who are parading around performing a charade of being a teacher....what did i hear..who the hell told you you are good..
uumm uhh...i conveniently turn deaf to that statement...
moving on...that is my state of mind right now....people,do you know...i realised something...during the past few days that i have been teaching....i have realised that....studying for your exams..for yourself is far more easier....because when we study..for the sole sake of marks...sometimes we have the choice of leaving stuff that go bouncer..or if you have the capacity of rote learning..by heart it and puke it out onto the answer sheets....
but as a teacher,you do not have that liberty..you have to be so clear about everything cause you have a massive responsibility..a responsibility which has its basis on the trust and expectation of your students from you.....
sheesh..i feel old...i was a student myself a month back..here i am a professor to students 2 to 3 years younger to me....
i also feel that somehow someone dished out a foul deal to me.....you ask me why?
well..when i was a student i used to study a few hours before exams...
now as a teacher i study everyday!!!!
i get up at 4 daily to revise....and i come home, hit the bunk,work out,and study again.......
i so have wanted to blog about so many stuff....but i have no energy and no time.....
i so crave my lazy,sloth like existence where i do not have to worry about whether the kids will take a jeans clad lady(who feels like a college kid herself) seriously....if they have a stereotype for a teacher and i do not fit in...

well,enough of cribbing i guess,so..i will let you know the best thing about my job....it is that spark,that dawn of realisation that you see in your student's eye when he/she just realised or understood what you explained,when a phenomenon which did not make sense to you just made sense.....
and trust me...no dope or booze could give you as high a high as the fact that you could actually have moments of extreme satisfaction in your job...

well...i guess,i will stop now..i need to go study some stuff...prokaryotic and eukaryotic genome structure...(looks around,scratches head)
why don't i remember something like that...uhh ohhh..wasnt that something i left as choice..during my final year in degree?

damn..i have to study it now!!!after all these years?!!!?..life sure has a way of getting back to you...see what i mean.....

well,Sam..you had asked me about my first day of teaching...well,to you and all our friends....
there are moments when i teach,when i look at the students...when their faces blur and they fade away...what i see is that their faces are replaced by familiar faces...faces of people who used to sit on those same benches with me..and shared some of the best times of my life......in this job....i face my past everday.....and it is bittersweet,i miss you guys.....


additional note which has no relevance to this topic:
i just found out Arshat is going for his MBA in 4 days..out of Mumbai..,well i knew he would be going..but so soon?..naaa..i wasnt expecting that...
i use this chance to wish him luck in his venture..as well as in his life.....
well,it was his idea that i start writing..and here i am...
thank you,mate..and keep in touch....you actually rock!!!!
here is to a great life ahead...
CHEERS!!!!!